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Wednesday, 5 September 2007

11.36pm
Heh, its ironic that I am in the same situation again. Pathetic. Sleepless. Sad. 1 year on and I am still having trouble getting over her. Yes its true. I still can't get over her. I have been lying to myself and all those around me. I can't get over her. Period.

The sad thing is, my heart still thinks that there is hope for us. Hah. That is one load of bullshit. I cannot believe it that I am actually weeping when I whine about this. Yeah, maybe I do pin alot on that teeny weeny piece of hope. It would take an EARTH load of miracle for us to be together, or God might do the trick.

I lost purpose in life. I'm like an empty vessel. Go to work, helping others, talking to them. But my mind, my heart is still stuck with someone. Thinking of the what ifs and what nots.

Every turn I take reminds me of her. Songs that I listen to, places that I go, all reminds me of her. Sometimes I just sit down and weep after praying, hoping that God would take all that away...

Zaki van Persie


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