Monday 25 February 2008
Hello Folks!
Oh my God ! Its almost a month since I last updated this ! Yes folks, been busy with my life. And coping with the failure of passing my driving test... haha.. Yes folks... looks like I need to postpone my Knight Rider plans ...
Well, for the first time this year, I thought I was going spend my life this Valentine alone. Well, the first half was with three single (actually 2 single, 1 semi-single) dudes. Well, then went back home and got a call from an old friend and other few friends. We then went out, couples and "couples".. as usual, got verbally abused for failing the driving test. Heh.. anyways, something happened and got me thinking alot about my love life these past few days. Whether am I able to love someone again, or does our primal instincts take over when all sense, logic and understanding is not present... I am still comprehending how does one live with the sense of guilt... Maybe, I am still dwelling over the guilt of the past... and lets it affect the present, and maybe the future...
I can safely say that this year has been very kind and generous to me. I would like to thank God for all his blessings that he has given and will be giving to me all these while and in the times to come, God-Willing.
Work has been good to me too... It seems like drawing the line really works for me... I cannot bring personal into my professional life... It is definitely bad for me. Lost a few "friends" along the way, and reconciliation is definitely difficult, considering each and every one decides to be headstrong and stubborn to hold on their own cause. I am wondering, why must it be me all the time that needs to bite the bullet, take the damage, face the crap everyday ??? Why can't it be him, or her or whoever other than me ??? Oh well, the line is drawn, and redrawn. Thinking of putting up an ELECTRIC fence on it.. :-) ... maybe it will effectively work...
Oh well, I am definitely not going to dwell on this... As to me, this is insignificant... Hurts me even more if I take it to heart... Still mourning over the loss of a fiance... let alone wanting to mourn over idiots and jerks like this... PLEASE REPLACE MY HEART ! A STAINLESS STEEL ONE !
Zaki van Persie